I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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