I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
