Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
