the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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