So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
