So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I would fuck him just for his dog
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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