Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
My bed smells like the plague
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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