38 yer olds are good kisserssss
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Vodka?
Forever.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
