Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
