So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize