well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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