They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
