Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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