Someone shit on the floor
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
