"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
