My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize