i barfeds in our rink
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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