Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
