question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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