i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize