She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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