Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
