Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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