i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
