I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
