Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
My feet surprised me
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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