oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize