k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize