My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
