with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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