so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Shame - the story of my life.
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