You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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