i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
