he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
