I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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