careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
