Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
