he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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