Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
