No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
