**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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