i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
