Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
it's like iHOP with fire
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize
