oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
