Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I need water and some morals
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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