My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize