You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We don't watch enough power rangers
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
