So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
