i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
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