Everything about him screamed your future.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
