i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Randomize
