hotel room ftw
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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